How to Talk to Elderly Parents About Health Care and Power of Attorney

Adjusting to the aging process can be difficult. Often, the elderly feel they are becoming a burden on their families. They may not be comfortable discussing advance health care directives and powers of attorney. These documents instruct doctors and medical professionals on how to proceed if and when someone becomes incapacitated and cannot make or voice decisions on his own. Elderly parents may not want to relinquish control of these decisions. Speaking about these documents with your parents may help them understand their importance.

• 1

  Start the conversation with some small talk to gauge your elderly parents' attitude and openness to talking to you. Bring up the weather, current news events and other random topics prior to diving into the health care and power of attorney talk. If your parents seem approachable, bring up the health care issues. Otherwise, consider waiting to have the conversation at a time when parents seem ready to talk.

• 2

  Discuss the importance of planning for their health. Conditions such as Alzheimer's and stroke often strike the elderly and leave them incapacitated and unable to make health care decisions. Bring up scenarios involving extended life support and hospital bills. Talk about how advanced planning can alleviate these troubles.

• 3

  Explain that a power of attorney and living will do not rob your parents of their decision-making abilities. These documents can be written in a way that specifically states when and how they become effective. The documents also can be written so they cover only specific situations, including specific diseases and types of treatment.

• 4

  Reiterate that they can trust you to make the right decisions and that you cannot do anything without their consent. This helps keep the ultimate decision with your elderly parents in deciding whether or not to execute a power of attorney or advance health care directive.